The eight cringiest lines in EU Commissioners’ job applications

The European Parliament in Strasbourg, France

Algae – AP Photo

The Commission promised, among other things, to “analyse availability of algae-related data” and to look at algae’s use as a foodstuff. Bon appetit!

4. Having a father who had been a European Commissioner certainly left a positive mark.

Kallas, named in June by EU leaders as pick to be the High Representative – effectively the bloc’s top diplomat — isn’t afraid to name-drop.

She’s already followed her father Siim’s footsteps as Estonian prime minister and now is hoping to do so at the EU executive; he served as commissioner for transport and administrative affairs over a decade ago.

She’s hardly the first nepo baby in the EU bubble – European Council President Charles Michel is the son of ex-Commissioner Louis Michel — but is perhaps hoping playing the connections card could win her some precious extra votes.

5. If appointed, I would be privileged, humbled, and honoured to join the College of Commissioners

The EU’s potential future financial services commissioner lays it on thick with prose that is giving us a big LinkedIn vibe.

During her three-hour hearing due on 6 November we expect her to ask MEPs on the Parliament’s Economic and Monetary Affairs Committee to add her to their professional network.

6. My passion for the EU project was sparked as a trainee at the European Parliament.

At just 35, Malta’s nominee promises to be the youngest member of the next European Commission.

It still seems he has fond memories of his internship in the EU institutions – and many of the hundreds who undertake the placements each year do.

Still, continuing to cite it on your CV as you apply to serve at the top of the EU executive might be a bit much.

7. Addressing these challenges will require continuous dialogue as well as the strategic use of our updated toolbox of autonomous instruments whenever necessary.

Šefčovič, from Slovakia, sets out in crisp euro-English how he’d tackle the threat from an increasingly aggressive Chinese trade policy – something that’s recently led the EU to impose punitive tariffs on Chinese electric cars.

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A former diplomat, Šefčovič is no stranger to the bureaucratic formulations that are all too standard in Brussels. Recall that the EU won its Nobel Prize for peace, not literature.

8. Islands are very diverse and face a variety of different challenges, including varying levels of economic growth and demographic trends, with some islands experiencing population growth, while others face decline.

The controversial pick from Italy has been named Executive Vice-President for Cohesion and Reforms.

According to the mission letter von der Leyen sent him, he’ll be responsible for looking at the problems facing the bloc’s many islands – including helping with the reunification of Cyprus.

Some islands – AP Photo

He’s set to face an intense grilling given his links to right-wing Prime Minister Giorgia Meloni – but at least he realises there’s a difference between Zealand and Ibiza.

Gerardo Fortuna and Jorge Liboreiro contributed reporting

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Publish date : 2024-10-23 17:00:00

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